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1. BE UNFAITHFUL TO CHURCH
Come to church only when you feel like it. It’s especially important to teach your children the “first things first” rule so only pay tithes and offering when you have extra money, that way you are sure to teach your family how to prioritize…the care of this life come first and God comes second.
2. BE ABUSIVE
Never use extreme physical or emotional abuse – but it is alright to use milder forms, such as daily put-downs, sarcastic remarks, other negative comments, withholding affection, refusing to talk, threatening to leave, etc.
3. BE DEFENSIVE
Never admit when you are wrong! Never listen to what the other person is saying. Especially effective is getting off the subject and finding one or more things you do not agree with!
4. BE CRITICAL
Do not listen to any constructive feedback. It can be unhealthy and very damaging to your self-esteem.
5. BE RIGHT ALL OF THE TIME
Perhaps the single biggest mistake is admitting you are sometimes wrong. Never compromise and never let them be right!
6. BE SELFISH
Think only about your own wants, needs, and desires. Put your concerns first and consider others’ needs much less important.
7. BE SUPERIOR
Make it your habit to put your children down in order to feel good about yourself. Always strive to win any competition, and never give anyone an even break. Never ask for guidance or support from others. And above all else, never admit any shortcomings that might make you appear weak or stupid.
8. BE CONTROLLING
Always try to get your children to think and feel exactly as you do. Try to intimidate them and dominate them. Make them fearful of crossing you or offending you by always responding with hostility and rage.
Children are like wet cement. Whatever falls on them makes an impression.
Dr. Haim Ginott
Beth Baus is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and has a private practice in Riverside, California. She teaches Christian Counseling and Psychology for Apostolic School of Theology/Hope International University. She attends Inland Lighthouse Church pastored by Rev. Larry Booker. To visit her website, go to www.ourhealthyfamilies.org
